I was so excited to see a friend that I have not seen in over 4 years, but while getting ready, I had a sense of sadness that rushed over me. Have you ever been in a situation, that no matter what you put on, everything just doesn't look, fit, or feel right?! That's exactly what was going on with me! I then had a domino effect that moved from my outfit, to my skin, my nails, and even to what direction my life is heading. Ruminating much?! I paused for a moment, went on my phone (probably not the best idea) started scrolling and immediately started comparing. The negative self-talk was loud and made it so difficult to get ready. I was feeling extremely insecure, and in that moment, I didn't even want to go and was thinking of an excuse to cancel. The self- doubt was present and any confidence I had was 100% minimized.
What do you do when the wave of feeling insecure hits you unexpectedly? How do you get yourself back to movement? Where did it even start in the first place?! Most of us experience not feeling our best and it could be due to many reasons, but I am learning that if we don't push and act quickly, we will continue to live in a space of regret and wonder. As I was thinking of what to do, I made the decision that I was going to go, because there was nothing physically prohibiting me from meeting up, it was all mental. Here is what I did that helped:
Took deep breaths with the 3-6-9 method. Inhale for 3 seconds, hold for 6 and exhale for 9. I did this a total of 5x, it truly helps, when you need to quiet the mind
I constantly repeated "its ok," and "you can do this," while breathing slowly. Try your best to replace the negative thoughts with something encouraging, I know it sounds cliche, but I'm telling you, it works!
Create an ambience! What seems to always help me while going through these moments, especially when getting ready is having music in the background and lighting a candle. I am really huge on aromatherapy as it calms me down and some good tunes can really brighten up the mood
Put on whatever makes you feel good! Your favorite perfume/cologne, lip, dress, jewelry, whatever is your fave, put it on! Accommodate the emotion of joy
Remind yourself why this is a good idea. Sometimes we need bullet points as to why we should do what we need to do, in this case, I really did miss my friend and held on to the idea that once we were together, it would be great time
Once I did the steps, I started to feel better, and the goal was to ensure I continued to get ready and get out the door! I decided to my on my favorite burgundy lip and my attitude changed! In addition, I added a fragrance I loved, some jewelry, and was ready to go! We truly have to fight to not only get ready physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. There was so much that occured within an hour in regards to my mindset, but I am happy that I was able to push. Once I was in my car and on the way, I knew there that I won the battle. I am so happy that I did because I had a PHENOMENAL time! I enjoyed the company, the new restaurant, the food, and drinks, which were all amazing! The way I was laughing and enjoying myself, you would have never known the insecure breakdown I was having minutes before! You know why? Simply because, it was just a moment. Just a moment that I have FULL control over and so do you!
There is much more I have to say in regards to insecurities, check out the latest Podcast Episodes Level of Insecurities Part 1 and 2! There are so many different angles, I couldn't even put it all in one episode! Take a listen for some personal stories, a deeper meaning of the start of insecurities, and steps we can take to ensure we are living even when it is present!
Be sure to follow STGG on social media,so many fun visuals in addition to the audio and blog! Take a look at the socials here!
What helps you when you feel insecure?
Talking To A Friend
Listening To Something Positive
Putting On Perfume/Cologne/Outfits
Having Alone Time
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